Wednesday, June 16, 2010

The Karate Kid: Then and Now


Like most children of the 1980's, 'The Karate Kid' paid my VCR frequent visits. "Wax on, wax off" randomly found its way into conversation and The Crane never got old.

Upon seeing the trailer of The Karate Kid (2010), I was riddled with skepticism. A long-time Jackie Chan fan and lover of the original film, I couldn't possibly imagine how any of this was a good idea. If anything, it felt like a step down. Not to mention, Pat Morita's Oscar-nominated performance as Mr. Miyagi felt irreplaceable. It is, but I was pleasantly surprised that this film breathed new life into a franchise long in need of a makeover. That's not to suggest I'd like to see any more versions of it. While the traditionalist in me was offended by the need to remake a favored childhood film, I also understand that younger generations would rather watch anything but something made prior to their birth. From this angle, this remake feels like a necessity. It's a feel-good winning formula audiences never tire of.

Watching the opening title sequence of the 2010 version, I noted that Will Smith & Jada Pinkett-Smith were among the films producers, heavily implying that Jaden Smith landed a role due to his parents involvement. I found myself studying his movements, trying to find glimpses of his parents. What I didn't anticipate was his natural talent and on-screen watchability. Yes, he was cute, and like most child stars will earn him harsher critiques, but his real appeal lies in his ability to bring the authenticity and heart to the picture required of any actor taking on the title role in the series. Dre Parker is more confident than Daniel LaRusso (who happened to be far more skittish than I remembered upon revisiting the original film for this review). However, his lack of karate skills and small stature and the ferocity of his enemies instantly makes you feel he's at a disadvantage. Watching both films back-to-back, Dre appears far more capable towards the film's climax of being a great fighter than Daniel. It seems Mr. Han (Jackie Chan) has prepared him far more for battle than Miyagi. Jackie Chan doesn't try to replicate Pat Morita, nor should he. Both turn in performances worthy of their leads. Only instead of Morita upstaging Ralph Macchio, Jaden Smith somehow manages to steal the show from world-famous icon Jackie Chan, no small feat. By the film's climax, I forgot Jaden Smith's family relations and had to give him the props he clearly deserved; only to be horrified that the film's ending title sequence is loaded with pictures of Jaden hanging out on set with his famous parents. Clearly, their names in the credits roll wasn't enough. This was a true disappointment felt after a feel-good show.

The ultimate curse of any celebrity offspring is having one famous parent, nonetheless two, and finding a way to dissociate the public with that. Every celebrity child suffers for this, as they have to work twice as hard to earn a name for themselves and endure constant comparison. Jaden Smith had the opportunity of a lifetime and proved himself worthy of it, regardless of how he ended up with the part to begin with. Sadly, his parents couldn't let him bask in his cinematic glory without reminding us all of his birthright. Given that I haven't seen Will Smith in a few years, I guess he felt the need to stay relevant. I personally feel they did their son a true disservice. Perhaps unsurprisingly, his son also does a Will Smith-esque rap in a soundtrack song in the film's ending. I have hope for Jaden Smith's acting future, he is a capable and multi-talented young artist who can forge his own path if he uses his parents as inspirations, not clones.

The Karate Kid story is timeless. Not simply because of fancy martial arts moves or unique character relationships, but because The Karate Kid is about self-respect. We all have choices in our daily lives to pack up our things and walk away or to confront challenges head-on. When the going gets tough, we can shape up or ship out. There comes a time in all our lives where we learn to stand on our own two legs (or one) and set out to chart a new course toward the life we deserve and truly want. Note that Miyagi and Han's lessons come in unconventional ways but teach discipline through the simple practices of picking up your clothes off the floor or painting a fence. After all, if respect doesn't begin within our own personal environments, we can't expect it outside our front door. LaRusso and Parker learn to respect themselves which ultimately leads them on the path to earning the respect of others. Not through flying fists but through an unwillingness to let the bullies have the last word and to take a stand. We all deserve to live lives free of fear and oppression, but acceptance first begins with us.

BONZAI!

Sunday, May 09, 2010

"Iron Man 2" Pays Homage to Walt Disney's Epcot



Attending a screening of 'Iron Man 2' on opening weekend, my inner Epcot fanchild could not have been more pleased. The film makes multiple references to my favorite Disney World park.

Tony Stark uncovers footage his father Howard left behind to help him unlock the secrets of his inventions. In this vintage footage, Howard speaks about the City of Tomorrow and stands in a suit and tie in front of the model of his futuristic city. He bears a striking resemblance to Walt Disney himself discussing his blueprint of his vision of the "Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow" (EPCOT). They even bear a similar mustache.

If you look at the actual model of the fictional city in the film, it bears an extreme resemblance to the actual early models built for Epcot right down to the placement and specific buildings, namely of Future World. As you can see in the film, Howard Stark's future city is ultimately built, as seen below Iron Man as he flies through the sky, including a flight between a metal globe that bears a similarity to the globe that travels through the middle of World Showcase Lagoon for the IllumiNations fireworks extravaganza.

Once Tony Stark uncovers the key to Howard Stark's vision, his electronic blueprints expand in mid-air into a perfect geodesic sphere that is Spaceship Earth, the iconic centerpiece of Epcot.

Clearly, Disney's $4 billion Marvel Comics investment has its perks.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

PopSpiracy's Practical Guide to Weight Loss



I bumped into an acquaintance at the supermarket this week I hadn't seen since last year. Her eyes bulged out of her head when she saw me, she barely recognized me. It's at times like these that I realize my weight loss has been truly drastic. The #1 question asked of me is, "How did you do it?" This question seems rather odd to me, as I believe the majority of the public is already well aware of how to lose weight, it's actually putting it into practice that is off-putting to many. Perhaps the question does warrant a lengthier explanation, so to answer the age-old question in a more precise manner, I bring to you my methods. In doing so, please note my plan worked for me and I can't guarantee it'll work for you. Also, I don't make any money off my blog so any products I may mention are simply personal preferences I felt willing to share. I lost weight as a personal goal, not to please others. I encourage all of you to make positive changes in your life and silence your inner critic. I feel great since my weight loss. If it's something you want to do for you, go for it.

In a rare breach of privacy, I bring to you the following - an admission that I was an emotional eater and junk food addict, that I lost massive amounts of weight in a short time span, and the story of how I did it.

It was 2008. I was going through a particularly horrendous time in my life emotionally, and it reflected in my habits. I found comfort in eating copious amounts of food; the less healthy, the better. While I didn't realize it at the time, my lack of nutrition and healthy habits increased the fluctuations of my moods and contributed to making life far worse for me than need be. A personal tragedy made me further aware that time was short, life was precious, and I needed to get myself together and feel better. Deep down, I believe we are all aware of the changes we need to make... it's finding the strength and willpower to do it that proves the most challenging.

From personal experience, I've found several personal motto's that I believe to be truthful and helpful:

#1: You are what you eat.
I never understood this expression when I was younger. I learned the hard way. This is sort of another take on the karmic belief that what you put out into the universe comes back to you. Eating and living in an unhealthy manner will result in an unhealthy you.

#2: Change is possible. The first step is BELIEVING.
Never underestimate the power of belief. Most people I know that have talked about weight loss come up with a great deal of reasons to procrastinate or to believe that it isn't going to happen. 'Well, I've tried before and it didn't work.' 'Maybe one day I will.' 'The universe made me this way.' I know right away said people won't lose the weight and do what needs to be done. The first step to change is realizing one needs to take place and to take personal responsibility. The second is BELIEVING change is possible. The rest will come, but only if you truly believe it can and will. Out of the firmness of that belief comes the willpower.

#3: Don't "diet".
Diets never work. People lose the weight only to rapidly put it on again. I don't call my eating habits a "diet", I call them a "lifestyle". It's a personal commitment, not a temporary fad.

I also have a few additional weight loss tips to share prior to delving deeper into my tale...

#1: The most valuable tip I ever heard about committing to a healthier lifestyle was to "fall in love with it". Go to supermarkets, pick up new things you've never tried, read the health magazines that are available near your health supermarket entrance or exit, you'd be amazed at the information they provide. Read about health, educate yourself about it. Own it. Get yourself excited about it or find new ways to change your perspective. Discover your alternative healthy supermarkets. If you stick to local, note that even WalMart is carrying a larger selection of all-natural and organic produce.

#2: Be patient. You won't see the results immediately. Trust the process and that it's working.

#3: SPEED UP YOUR METABOLISM.
You can do this by eating multiple times a day, at least 5 or 6 times. Meaning three meals and healthy snacks in between every few hours.

#4: Eat until you are satisfied, not until you are full.
If you can be responsible about it, you are allowed to eat something less than healthy once in a blue moon, and not feel horrible about it. If you don't allow yourself a little wiggle room once in a while, you aren't going to stick with it. Be responsible about your health and a little splurge every now and then won't hurt too much. Bring someone with you if you are going to have a desert and take a bite or two to satisfy any cravings, share the rest of the desert so you don't have to eat a whole thing.

#5: Tailor your food and exercise lifestyle to your liking.
Don't force yourself to eat foods you dislike, choose the fruits, veggies, etc. that you can actually stick to eating and enjoying. You don't have to suffer to eat delicious food and stay healthy. Stick to exercises and sports you enjoy, don't force yourself to do things you can't stand or it won't last.

Weight loss tip #6 (and a few extra pointers):
Eat at home. Restrict eating out to at least once a week. It'll save you a lot of money and loads of calories. Contrary to what your mother says, you don't have to eat everything on your plate. And certainly, not all at once. Bring home a doggie bag at restaurants. If you are on the road and think you have to eat junk food to get something quick, don't compromise your health for quick calorie intake. Many fast food chains now offer healthier alternatives and substitutions, i.e. apples instead of fries, etc. I find that purchasing kids meals is a great way to limit portion size and calories when you do splurge, same as kids packs at the movie theater. No, they won't ask for your ID! Eat before you go to the movies, ask for a cup for water while there. Instead of fast junk food, swing inside your gas station while pumping up. They have fruits available as well as ready-made sandwiches, such as your basic turkey-cheese for less than 250 calories. Who said convenience has to be bad?

Weight loss tip #7:
Drink lots of water. At restaurants, instead of asking for a multitude of drinks, stick with plain water. You'll be surprised at how much money is shed off your dining bills. Not to mention, the more water you drink at mealtime, the less food you'll eat as your stomach will have less room. Avoid sodas, even diet soda, which is loaded with aspartame. There are water calculators online that give you a rough idea of how much water you should drink daily for your size. When it comes to drinks, I stick with water and natural/low-cal fruit juices.

Health tip:
Eat organic and all natural where possible. It's not just a fad, the long term health benefits add up when you stay away from additives, preservatives, pesticides, hormones, etc, which cumulatively lead to numerous cancers and trips to the hospital. Yes, there are organic fries, burgers, etc. Note that these are healthier, but they are still what they are. Just because you see an organic chocolate chip cookie doesn't mean it isn't loaded with the usual calories!

READ LABELS. THOROUGHLY. Take into account serving size when adding up calories.

Even fast food restaurants now offer calorie counters on their websites. The next time you are craving that Burger King mega-meal, check the site first, do the calculations, and you might just talk yourself out of it.
________________________________________________________________

WHAT TO EAT
Humans are as diverse as it gets, do what works for you. I am mentioning some of my favorites and general thoughts on mealtime, again, tailor to meet your own liking.

BREAKFAST
They say this is the most important meal of the day. I'll be the first to admit I was never fond of having breakfast, so I found ways to do it while 'on the go'. Which generally means a healthy granola bar like Kashi, and some sort of yogurt, fruit, or smoothies. If it's cereal you want, there are plenty of healthy and inexpensive brands available at health food stores that are low in sugar. Instead of regular milk, try soy milk, almond milk, or rice milk.

The wonder that is "the smoothie".
Smoothies are fantastic and very easy to make. My recipe consists of:
-a bag of frozen fruit (there are all sorts of combinations possible. Your supermarket most likely has a mixed concoction, such as mixed berries or some sort of tropical blend)
-a scoop of rice or soy-based ice cream, as opposed to dairy) to thicken
-powders/granules (You can toss in all sorts of healthy things in a smoothie you can't taste, such as whey protein powder. I also use lecithin granules (soy) and bee pollen, which comes in granule form) for extra vitamins, protein, etc. There are numerous vitamin powders and combinations available, chose those that meet your particular needs.
-one bottle of all natural fruit juice (apple, pineapple, etc)

All of this should fit into your blender, and should make three servings worth. There are great smoothie bottles you can buy, I recommend filling three of them up and keeping them in your refrigerator for the week so you can grab and go if you have a busy day or not hassle yourself in the morning with preparation. Smoothies are quick to make and very healthy.

Other breakfast items I enjoy are apple slices with nut butters (such as almond butter, etc).

Note that there are healthier versions of breakfast foods available on the market, feel free to make substitutions. For example, if you are a bacon lover, choose turkey bacon instead. It's tasty and has half the fat. Health food stores should offer you a number of organic sausages, buckwheat pancakes, etc. You don't have to sacrifice the foods you love, find substitutions or alternate versions that provide great taste and healthy benefits.

LUNCH

Lunch should be your largest meal of the day. I recommend making your lunch meals in advance and leaving them in tupperware in the fridge so you can grab and go in the morning and not be tempted to eat lunch out.

I will confess to having a love of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches which I often choose as a lunch possibility. I chose jelly that is sugar-free, organic, all natural, etc. and peanut butter with extra health benefits, such as Naturally More, which is high in fiber. The best solution I've found to yummy sandwich bread is Arnold Wheat Thins. They are literally miraculous. Only 100 calories and available in flavors from Honey Wheat to Multi-Grain and Whole Wheat, they are inexpensive, come in decent size packs, stay fresh in your fridge, and are just the right size for portion control and are very tasteful. Many brands have jumped on the bandwagon with similar products. They have so many purposes it's astounding - you can toast them and spread nut butters or jams on them for breakfast, you can turn them into lunch sandwiches, or use them as hamburger buns.

DINNER

Make sure to have your final meal several hours prior to bedtime. No midnight snacks!

SNACKS
Fruits, honey glazed almonds, nuts, seeds, organic apple sauce, fruit cups (beware high sugar content), yogurt (particularly greek yogurt), salads (watch the dressing!), Quakers cheddar cheese mini-cakes, etc.

CHEESE
I eat a small portion of light or reduced-fat cheese every day, such as a mini-Babybel cheese wheel or mini-cheese wedge on light crackers.

BEANS
While I still eat meat, I eat it less. I have incorporated beans into my lifestyle. While baked beans appear to be an American staple at cookouts, I admittedly never made friends with many members of the legume family until recently. Since I changed my food habits, I found that my body not only changed, but began to ask me for different things. Listen to your body, it knows what it needs. Apparently, my body wanted more beans and less meats, and being as beans are so high in protein. Watch out for the sodium in beans, aim for sodium-free and reduced fat items.

SUBSTITUTIONS
I was never aware there was such a large number of great-tasting substitutes on the market. As a self-proclaimed picky eater, I was wary of this concept. I have since learned this is a mistake, not only does eating healthy taste great, but I can still eat the things I like in healthier versions. Veganaise is one of the miracle substitutions I've discovered. It doesn't taste identical to mayonnaise though it has a similar consistency, however it has a very pleasant taste and works fantastic in sandwiches, deli casserole/salad recipes, etc. It is refrigerated and often found at health supermarkets. Meatless meat was an idea that would have scared me in the past, but I have found it to be intriguing. Who knew meatless meatballs really tasted like meatballs?! Don't be afraid to explore and try new things. You just might surprise yourself.

EXERCISE
My approach to this is much like my approach to food - tailor it to your liking if you want to make it a habit. No one is going to force themselves to eat food they don't like or do exercises they can't stand if they don't want to. There's a fallacy that one needs to spend a lot of money to eat healthy and to lose weight. This is untrue. There are plenty of ways to cut corners at the supermarket (fruits and veggies don't cost that much, it costs more to eat out than to eat in, and you can even buy a baked organic whole chicken for less than $10 and turn it into a 3-day meal! Be creative.) and you certainly don't need a gym membership to lose weight. You can go for walks around your neighborhood, up and down stairs, take a hiking trail, bicycle ride, join a sports team, etc. Develop a new skill, practice a hobby, or find other ways to entertain yourself. Even at the gym, you can watch TV, read books, listen to your iPod, etc. Even taking small opportunities to stretch out your legs is great, i.e. taking that distant parking lot space, walking a few blocks to run an errand, even taking the stairs instead of the elevator. Exercise a few days a week even for half an hour and you'll see a difference.

Good luck, readers! Weight loss is possible. You can do it. If you've been thinking about it... Get to it!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

"Killer" Whale, Indeed.


PopSpiracy wants to pay respects to SeaWorld trainer Dawn Brancheau, killed in Shamu Stadium in Orlando today. SeaWorld has long held a special place in my heart since childhood, and I have been an annual passholder several times over. There was a time when I practically lived at SeaWorld. I remember Dawn well, having last seen her a few months ago during "Believe", SeaWorld's latest rendition of the famed Shamu Show. She was bright and cheery, a woman in love with her job and killer whales.

As PopSpiracy encourages truth in media, I'd like to express my disappointment with Sea World's statement made by Seaworld Vice President Dan Brown. It's hard to believe his sincerity when he's lying straight through his teeth. If SeaWorld was not yet prepared to release any details, they should have remained vague instead of giving us an obviously fabricated story when there were plenty of witnesses who could corroborate the truth.

I get it. SeaWorld is a corporation. Shamu is an image. You can't let the children of the world think their precious Shamu is indeed a killer! However, he is what he is, which is to say an Orca, and the most powerful and skilled hunter in the sea. Trainers know this better than anyone, as they work with tons of sheer lethal muscle daily.

According to Brown, the trainer slipped in the tank and was accidentally fatally injured. First of all, what is this latest trend in blaming the victims? i.e. the Olympic's official statement regarding the death of the Georgian luger? It is majorly insensitive to accuse a victim who can no longer speak out to defend themselves, and I'm sure their families have suffered enough without the added blow. Nonetheless, releasing a statement that was blatantly untrue is tactless and thoughtless. This leads me to feel the bigwigs in charge of SeaWorld have little regard for the memory of this poor woman, who they in the same paragraph describe as one of their most experienced trainers. According to multiple eyewitness accounts and a Sea World employee, the whale grabbed the trainer by her ponytail and violently thrashed her around - in other words, behavior killer whales employ to knock out their victims and kill. I must also question the logic of SeaWorld in taking in Tilikum, the whale responsible for the attack, who had a track record of killing two other people during his time spent at multiple parks. Knowing this, why did he end up performing at SeaWorld if those in charge knew his violent history? Clearly, trainer safety is not priority, despite claims to the contrary.

I am honestly astounded at the mistruths spoken, it made SeaWorld look absolutely shady beyond belief for them to release such a careless lie that was not only harmful to the victim's memory and family but knowing full well there were numerous witnesses, who didn't hesitate to spill the beans.

SeaWorld has long been a controversial staple long before this incident. I personally have supported SeaWorld, they are a leader in the rehabilitation of sea creatures and public education on sealife. They take in, rehabilitate, and release numerous animals and remind us all how precious these species are and why we should care. There is no substitute to being able to see and learn about animals face-to-face, and while I acknowledge Shamu(s) are sacrificial lambs, there are less than 100 killer whales in captivity globally and as representatives of their species to the world, who knows how many children who saw Shamu or had the pleasure of meeting him grew up to be animal activists or marine biologists? I've always found the Shamu experience to be incredibly powerful and inspirational, and I was one such kid who can honestly say my life was changed by seeing this powerful and majestic creature. I applaud SeaWorld for taking larger steps in recent years to create less stress for the performers (whales), prior to the show the gate is opened and the whales have the option of swimming out. If none do, the show is cancelled. If one or two swim out, they are the lone performers. If they all want to have a go, they can. Obviously they are trained with reward systems, but are clearly not going to be starved if they do not perform. There are rules and procedures that will no doubt be re-evaluated and changed, and perhaps this will work out best for whales and humans alike.

Regardless of the general good I feel SeaWorld is capable of, those feelings have hit a low point today. The careless, insensitive, and dishonest remarks by SeaWorld are truly rock bottom for this park and Dawn, SeaWorld trainers, employees, orcas, and fans alike deserved better.

It is my deepest hope that SeaWorld apologize to Dawn's family and the public for this ugly reaction and take its steps to restoring faith in its following.

RIP, Dawn.

Saturday, December 05, 2009

2009 in Review

2009, the fabulous year that brought us everything from OctoMom to Snuggies.

Let's take a stroll down memory lane before blowing out our decade's candles.

Remember the millenium - when everyone thought the world would blow up and our computers would fall silent? I guess all the death hags are celebrating the impending arrival of 2012.


In 2009, we couldn't get enough of women that couldn't stop birthing.





Behold, "The Gosselin". This hairdo graced Halloween shelves and sent children screaming in sheer terror.
















The mere name "OctoMom" was enough to induce permanent celebacy. Nadya Suleman (otherwise known by her Indian name "Angelina Jolie on Crack") graced supermarket tabloids
nationwide, reminding us all to use a condom.







This year was littered with men clamoring for the Douchebag Dad of the Year Award.

Esteemed nominees include...



The Gosselin #2, otherwise known as "Ed Hardy Har Har". This lovely specimen FINALLY pulled his children off television (for a momentous 2 seconds) after his name was dropped from the TLC show that drained the life out of America for... er, who many years has it been?


Please, make it stop.

(Not to toot my own horn, but PopSpiracy warned you about these two prior to any marital hell being made public. We know how to spot a scam when we see one!)




The one and only (thankfully) Michael Lohan.



Birds of a feather suck together, and it's not surprising Jon & Michael Plus A Load of BS were seen parading around town. That is, until Michael Lohan recorded conversations with Jon Gosselin proving... I'm still not sure what. One look at this grease fry and I want to run and hide in Samantha Ronson's hat collection, too.











Tiger Woods - King of the Slut Jungle!


Do YOU have what it takes to catch the eye of the Tiger?

Probably not. If a supermodel can't do the job, nothing will.













The winner of this year's awards is none other than Richard Heene, otherwise known as Balloon Boy's Dad. Didn't I see this guy's face on Unsolved Mysteries a decade ago?

Balloon Boy wishes he could be teleported in a sea of tin foil to the great beyond. Even throwing up on TV wasn't enough to get that poor kid out of an interview...






FAMEWHORES 2009








2009 also brought us the world's favorite famewhores, the Salami's Salahi's!















The most brazen nuts of the year no doubt belong to this bitch, who refuses to let the spotlight shine on boring couples everywhere. Whenever the Travelocity gnome is ready to retire, he's game.








Levi Johnston, semi-nude semi-Son-In-Law from Hell

Like the rest of this nation, I waited in anticipation for the Big Johnston to arrive, only to be massively disappointed. And they wonder why no one looks at Playgirl anymore! (Even Marge Simpson's appearance in Playboy was hotter.) Anything that upsets Sarah Palin is generally a victory for me, so even though it's rated G, I'll take it.






The 2009 Fame Whore Championship pits these two hotties face-to-face in the ultimate catfight of all times:










Spaghetti Cat





VS.



Keyboard Cat




Who will win? Probably Keyboard Cat. At least he does something.





This was the year some couldn't escape The Twilight Zone, forced to choose between Team Edward or Jacob.


Should I sleep with the Werewolf or the Vampire? Sigh. Being a teen girl these days is SO complicated. Not to mention, it sucks.








UNDERDOGS OF 2009







Susan Boyle, giving us a completely staged moment that brainwashed the globe. Even PopSpiracy couldn't help but shed a tear watching this, even if it was bogus.











The Underdog of the Year Award officially goes to the deserving Swine.



We fry them up in little bacon strips and bits, put coins in them, force them to be household pets, compare them to people we don't like, then when we get the flu, it's their fault.


Pointless Fad of the Year:





THE SNUGGIE. More specifically, the pet Snuggie. We expect humans to fall for ridiculous advertising shams and horrible fashion, but seriously, what did this Dachsund do to deserve this global humilation??? (Keyboard Cat is chuckling and prepping himself as we speak.)











Everyone knows a crap product doesn't sell itself. Sadly, two pitchmen giants got more than they bargained for in 2009.






Vince Shlomi got ShamWowed and Slap Chopped by a hooker.


















Billy Mays got Oxi-Cleaned and sent to the grand pearly gates beyond, which are no doubt more sparkly than ever.












The contenders for the 2009 Anger Management Award are:





Christian Bale, reprising his role as American Psycho on set.



















The ever-so cuddly Chris Brown.

















Kanye West, i.e. The G.O.A.T. (Greatest of All Times).











Couples of the Year
(Wouldn't you just like to be the third wheel?):






Leanne Rhimes & Eddie Cibrian





VS.








Balthazar Getty & Sienna Miller








Don't fight, ladies. There's enough of these boys to go around.






Khloe Kardashian & Lamar Odom. That they are the only marriage this year that even comes to mind is pretty sad. Oh well, at least Lamar is a step above loser-baby daddy Scott Disick (sorry, Kourtney. You could SO do better.)












VILLAINS OF 2009







Dishonorable Mention: Carrie Prejean, the only mouthpiece capable of saying nothing relevant.








Murderers of the Year:




Ryan Jenkins: Proof reality TV is a fraud.


They say every cloud has a silver lining. It's hard coming up with one when your limbs are severed and you are stuffed in a suitcase, but thanks to Jasmine Fiore, women everywhere can rest assured that there is a positive side to getting breast implants. RIP, Jas. You deserved better.








Conrad "I was in the wrong place at the wrong time" Murray.
Responsible for taking out the radness that was Michael Jackson. Murray is probably sitting in the Bahamas as we speak sipping a strawberry daquiri and living the good life. Good job, LAPD.

Hero of 2009:


Captain Chelsey "Sully" Sullenberger




Every time I start to lose faith in the human species or the media's
inability to capitalize on anything positive, a creature like this emerges
to bring hope where it's needed. Ladies and gentleman, I present you
with the captain that makes water landings possible. Sully, you are a true wingman.





Words of the Year: "Twitter" and "Cougar"


Art of the year: Obamicon.







Don't lie, you know you made one (or ten).











We lost a lot of amazing people in 2009.


This one brought us a neverending slew of Kodak moments, how boring is the pop culture landscape going to be without him?

RIP to the KOP. Only he could deliver this level of awesome.




RIP to DJ AM, Ted Kennedy, Farrah Fawcett, Walter Cronkite, Bea Arthur, Ed McMahon, Patrick Swayze, Natasha Richardson, John Hughes, Ken Ober, and all the people who helped pepper our lives with entertainment and brilliance. We miss you.

Bon Voyage to a jam-packed decade.

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Why No Hurry to Nab Dr. Murray? And other Michael Jackson updates.

It's hard to believe, but Michael Jackson died in June and it's November. Someone please remind me why Dr. Conrad Murray isn't in jail yet.

The only talk to the effect of his arrest hasn't even been in relation to killing Michael Jackson, but rather locking him up for not paying child support. During the trials, police marched straight over to Neverland and handcuffed Michael and dragged him out of bed, throwing him in the slammer on someone's word alone immediately (he was cleared of any wrongdoing). Two autopsies have been performed, it has been confirmed that Dr. Murray's lethal dosage of Propofol killed Michael Jackson, and he's still going wherever he wants, doing as he pleases while Michael lies beneath the ground permanently. Hypocrisy much?

I realize it takes a while to build an investigation, but they did find the vials of Propofol and traced them back to him and appear to have all the proof they need. Regardless, does it take six months to make this connection? Why is everyone taking their sweet old time? Why does no one appear concerned about this whatsoever? FYI: Conrad Murray has been jailed before, for domestic violence.

As a fan and concerned citizen, I'm sad and disturbed by this, and I can't imagine how furious Michael's family and friends are. Naturally the media isn't bringing up any of these issues and just want to talk about all the people suing Jackson's estate.

I can't help but feel if this was any other celebrity, Dr. Murray would have been in jail overnight. I really shouldn't be surprised, yet I am. That Michael Jackson is the victim in this case does certainly change things. When the ambulance arrived after Michael's cardiac arrest, the LAPD didn't seal the crime scene, as they were supposed to in an event when the cause of death is unknown, especially in a situation with so many possibilities. Again, they failed to even suspect it could be a crime scene and didn't take the appropriate action to secure the evidence. After all, it's Michael Jackson.

Dr. Murray had the paramedics continue to give him CPR for an hour even though he was already dead before getting in the ambulance, and he staged a scene giving Michael CPR and calling his son Prince to watch, even though again, Michael was already dead. Can you imagine the psychological trauma that poor kid has to live with on top of what is inherently already going to be there? Then, Dr. Murray fled the scene and left his car there, and had the Propofol FedExed to his girlfriend. Naturally, the YouTube video came thereafter where he tried (and failed) to make himself a sympathetic character. Propofol shouldn't even be administered outside of a hospital setting under any circumstances, nonetheless to someone in relatively good health.

There is no reason this thing is still even going on, if anyone's even keeping up with it anymore. I truly hope justice prevails, no one deserves to die at the hands of another. I was sincerely hoping this case would blow the lid off of the multitude of criminal doctors who endlessly flood celebrities with any prescription they want for their own gain. Too many stars have died needlessly and a case of this magnitude truly had the opportunity to make a difference so this fate would not befall another. It would be nice to say one good thing came out of the tragedy, but it appears another golden opportunity was lost to do something truly noble.

I hate to even stoop to the level of addressing this, but TMZ's recent "article" suggests that Michael's accuser from 1993 was able to accurately describe in detail Michael's genitals. (This, by the way, is untrue. Michael was subjected to a thorough strip search and it was revealed the description was inaccurate, which also accounts for this 'evidence' not being introduced in court for the later case.) TMZ goes on to say that Michael's plastic surgeon Arnold Klein says the reason the boy could describe this (which again, he couldn't) was because Michael liked peeing in front of people. I really don't know how much money Dr. Klein is getting that he's galavanting around town on every news show with one BS story after another, but it's so sad to think someone Michael Jackson trusted so much was so pathetic. (If Dr. Klein did indeed say any of this). With the constant Dr. Klein interviews, it's safe to say they serve to distract the authorities and public from the fact that he was also responsible for prescribing Propofol and other drugs to Michael outside of his practice, something he has since admitted yet vehemently denied at the time of Michael's death. And, not surprising that TMZ is wasting everyone's time dragging up lame gossip that completely desecrates the memory of a fallen entertainer. For in-depth information on the trials (as I seriously hope I don't have to address any more ridiculousness regarding them, there is a post available on this page which provides any thought/analysis I have on the topic).

One more blog fact-check - Perez Hilton has been continuously reporting that "This Is It" is bombing at the box office and made $2 million dollars. It has made over $100 million worldwide in a week, hence the extended release. Perez also pointed out that Fandango is giving out tickets for $1, which, by the way, they do for new releases all the time.

Saturday, October 31, 2009

The Alliance for Inclusion in the Arts vs. Abigail Breslin


Oscar-nominated Little Miss Sunshine herself, Abigail Breslin, is set to play Helen Keller on Broadway. Not everyone's a happy camper.

Sharon Jensen, exec director of the Alliance for Inclusion in the Arts, has this to say: “We do not think it’s O.K. for reputable producers to cast this lead role without seriously considering an actress from our community. I understand how difficult it is to capitalize a new production on Broadway, but that to me is not the issue. There are other, larger human and artistic issues at stake here.”


The media is overhyping this statement, suggesting that Deaf and Blind advocacy groups are upset by this casting choice. Really, Sharon Jensen just needs a Xanax. If casting a hearing and seeing child actor in a play is the biggest human issue happening amongst people with disabilities, we're living in a pretty rad world.

People can be so sensitive about casting. I remember when Zhang Ziyi (world-famous Chinese starlet) was cast in "Memoirs of a Geisha" and there was a huge uproar over her casting. China banned the film, calling Ziyi "an embarassment to China" for playing a Japanese Geisha girl. Do people not understand the definition of "acting"? Should Ted Bundy be cast in any role involving a serial killer? Should royalty be cast in Disney productions? Do gays have to play gay roles? Who cares. The whole point of acting is to find a kernel of truth in playing a character other than yourself. Transformation. Somehow, that got lost in the mix.

I remember playing Helen Keller on stage. It was one of my favorite performance memories, and the role and courage of Helen Keller inspired me to tempt to learn American Sign Language, with which I thought about being an ASL interpreter. The role had a strong impact on my life, you don't have to be blind or deaf to be inspired by this brave woman's journey.

I agree that it's unfortunate that certain minorities and the disabled community don't get more work in Hollywood or on Broadway. This has been an issue from the beginning affecting countless groups of people. It is not an inclusive industry and stereotypical depictions abound. Aside from the amazing Marlee Matlin, few of us can name a slew of deaf or blind actors.

While I encourage all minorities and peoples of every background and walk of life to share their experience with the world and pursue their dreams, I highly doubt a statement like this made after-the-fact makes much difference. I am reminded of Marlon Brando's then-wife Sacheen Littlefeather (an Apache Indian and president of the National Native American Affirmative Image Comittee) accepting rejecting his Oscar for "The Godfather" at the Academy Awards as a statement of opposition to Hollywood's exclusionary casting of Native American actors. She was promptly booed off the stage, and decades later I can't recall many Native Americans in film since. This doesn't mean minorities and actors with disabilities should cease the fight for recognition and casting. Change never occurs without opportunities for raising awareness and demanding your voice be heard. Hollywood may be a fast town, but it's slow in fundamental areas.

While I respect the idealism displayed here, I disagree with the idea that deaf or blind actors should be cast in the role of Helen Keller as much as I see no point in any actor being boxed in for any reason. There is much we can all learn from this character, regardless of whose eyes she is shown to us through. I also disagree on this level of attention being brought to a matter that pales in comparison to the inequalities in the educational system for the deaf and blind or the numerous health and social issues regarding minorities and disabled individuals face on a daily basis. Let's get the focus back on the real "larger human issues" at stake, not the sideshow diversions.